Now...here is where the twins issue comes into play...I have one child screaming in pain because her sister just bit her, and needed consolation and one child who just bit her sister and needs discipline. Both are screaming and crying, both are only 23 months old so timing is of the essence in these matters. I don't want to put Cordi down as she did nothing wrong and was definitely wronged, but have to in order to deal with the biter while the biter remembers that she just bit her sister.
All this gives me a headache. The issue was dealt with though I don't think properly...not to mention I am not entirely sure Ari was dealt with enough to know what she did was BAD. Cuddled Cordi for 10 minutes or more with ice and put them both down for nap. They were out in 2 minutes...I would be too with all that drama. They woke up and poor Cordi is going to have her sister's teeth marks on her cheek for awhile. By the size of the red marks my guess is Ari bit her pretty stinking hard, I noticed actual tooth indentations initially, but those have since faded... *sigh* Thus is is life with twins I guess. REALLY hope this is NOT a consistent pattern of behavior.
the damage...
Oh Tracy!!! Poor baby! If this helps at all, I've learned that Bryson can wait if he's "fussy." If I have to deal with Brode, first, than so be it... I know it's not the same as twins, but the same logic applies... Discipline first, then cuddle them both second. :) That's my two cents!
ReplyDeleteGOOD LUCK!
Oh honey! I can echo Sarah in that I've not had the twin thing, but I did have the who to deal with first moments. From teaching preschool I learned (from many sources, most vastly more experienced than I) that children don't differentiate between positive and negative attention. Therefore, while dealing with the offender first may seem logical, you are in fact giving in to what they wanted in the first place-your attention. I had to start a pattern of putting the offender in their crib, bed or room, comforting the offended, and then dealing with the offender. They are getting past the stage of forgetting in 2 minutes. They are really smart at 2(ish) and I would always show/reiterate what the offense was and just letting them not have my attention when they attempted to get it in the wrong way seemed to send a pretty clear message. okay, sorry for rambling! As you already know, my children have turned out perfectly-(snort!) But handling them that way is something I've never come to regret. Love you friend, and enjoy the mama ride ;o)
ReplyDeleteThanks ladies.
ReplyDeleteSarah-that was the approach I tried to take...there was much talking through and reaffirming that we love them and biting is so very not ok. :)
Min-your thoughts make sense. I will file them away for the next time as I am SURE something like this will happen again. :)